You Can’t Make This Stuff Up

On one hand, it is so awful that a presidential campaign in America has so much in common with a menagerie.  On the other hand, it is great theater (farce. by any standard).

Rather than a circus sideshow, substitute a baseball metaphor for the capably-challenged GOP team.  Baseball aficionados may debate my choices.  Applying my criteria (their collective failure was enduring and laughable) this team would never win a game.  Hence the metaphor: none of the GOP can win either.

Here’s the All-Time Worst Major League Baseball Lineup:

1B-Marv Throneberry

2B-Mario Mendoza

SS-Dal Maxvill

3B-Craig Paquette

LF-Pete Grey (okay, so he had one arm)

CF-Darren Lewis

RF-Brian Hunter

C-Bob Uecker

P-Bob Kammeyer and Tommy LaSorda

Umpire-Max Patkin (clown prince of baseball)
It’s actually a pleasure watching Mute and Newt go at it.  The people on the street neither like nor trust Mute.  The people in Congress are repulsed by Newt, starting with Boehner who was a force in the removal of Newt as Speaker and whose contempt for the man remains barely beneath the surface.  I had to guffaw when it was said by one analyst that people know Newt is mean and gruff; it will play out that Mute is meaner and less capable of sloughing off his negativity.

I kind of miss Cain already.  He brought a certain something (don’t know what) to the menagerie. Maybe he can get together with Sandusky and run as an independent.  Wondering how that would go over?

 

Fortunately, Trump has reemerged to add a distinct odor to the GOP campaign.  The buffoon-apprentice is shallow and few respect him unless they are sucking up to him for obviously political reasons.  My sense is that his ‘debate’ will not come off and he will have some explaining to do. His arrogance will then lead him to get back in the mix as an independent, going after both sides with a similar vengeance.

Mute has come out in support of extending payroll taxes and jobless benefits. Unfortunately Mute remains mute when asked how he proposes the pay-for. What a guy.  Terrific candidate.  I hear those visiting the Javits Center and Rockefeller Institute feel the ground beneath them rumbling Jake and Rocky turn over and over in their graves..

 

Here’s the Teapublican Lineup:

1B-Rick Perry (first class idiot)

2B-Mitt Romney (second is fitting)

SS-Michele Bachmann (shortest run of the group)

3B-Sarah Palin (the hot corner)

LF-Rick Santorum (left out of debates)

CF-Jon Huntsman (center of this group)

RF-Ron Paul (who’s more right?)

C-Herman Cain (likely caught something from a lady)

P-Newt Gingrich (screwball pitcher)

Umpire-Grover Norquist (clown prince of pledges)